Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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