brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
organizing the empties. That sober.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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