Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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