Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
where are my eyebrows?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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