He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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