and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
