Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
