he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I just had sex on a roof
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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