I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
they need to just BURY HIM!
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
