Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
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She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
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You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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