He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize