Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Randomize