So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
My dick has a subreddit
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
