CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
