there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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