I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
