i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
