this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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