garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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