Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
