The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize