You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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