When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
