Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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