You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize
