forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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