So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
