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Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
