I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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