Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
two words: eviction party
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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