You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
