Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
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