24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Terrible idea I love it
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
