any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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