All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
