We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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