it hurts more in the daytime
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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