butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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