Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
