Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize