can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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