Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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