Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess