Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
