smell my finger.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
