I just made out with a guy for $7.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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