I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
