similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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