I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize