you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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