Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize